7 Simple Micro Habits for Success

“Motivation makes us start to move toward our goals, but it is our habits that determine if we reach them.”

Habits are the way we think, feel and react to different situations based on repetition of certain mental experiences. Old habits are very hard to break, and new ones are even harder to form as the certain patterns we use to repeat are set in our neural pathways in such a way that it is difficult and time-consuming to break and form new ones.

Therefore, we have to carefully choose the habits that will in grain in us the ability to react in such a way that would be beneficial for us.

Seven habits have had a major impact on my life.

All of them can be completed in individually in 20 minutes or less so, they will not take up to much of your time. That why I call them my micro habits.

They have ingrained in me the qualities I would need to succeed and if you adopt these habits, there is a very good chance you will feel the same way as I do.

1) Reading

This may be the most important of all the seven micro habits, just 20 minutes of daily reading could have massive benefits.

Reading is a strong mental activity and it builds fundamental skills that one would need, it wards of diseases such as Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, while building up your self-discipline as although everyone knows they should read most of us have many distractions and taking out even 20 minutes a day can be difficult.

Other than self-discipline, reading also builds up our self-esteem as the more you read, the more you know, and would be considered as an expert on the topic you read, which could be quite a confidence booster.

2) Power ups

Power ups is a thing I do, which raises a person’s testosterone levels, giving them higher confidence and self-belief.

So how to do Power ups?

Well, power ups are a certain physical and verbal acts that can be done anywhere.

You may be feeling nervous and you need to give a very important presentation in front of your boss or maybe in front of big prospective clients, do a power up before going in to give the presentation.

You can go to the washroom and in front of the mirror do the Rocky victory stand and visualize yourself giving the best presentation of your life.

Psychologist Amy Cuddy has found out in her research that by doing power positions you are able to increase the Testosterone level by 20% and decrease your stress hormone Cortisol by 30%.

3) A page a day

Try maintaining a personal journal and to at least write a page a day. Keeping and writing in a journal has many benefits to stop.

By writing your thoughts, your beliefs, and values you better able to understand who you are? What you want in life? What you are willing to do to achieve it? And to many other such questions.

The other main reason for maintaining a journal is that you’re able to track your mental and emotional development and that by doing so are able to steer your life in a positive direction achieving real personal growth.

4) Gratitude Beads

Get a pair of prayer beads and just as soon as you get up and go to sleep, for one whole round on each bead say one thing that you are truly grateful for in your life.

Doing this reminds you daily of all that you have, you could be grateful for good friends, family, business/job, health and all that which is important to you.

No amount of words would begin to describe the feeling of relief and happiness you will get from doing this.

5) Smiling

Well, this is kind of a given everyone knows how important it is to smile to laugh, but I would like to add some of the benefits of smiling here.

The act of smiling is very pleasing to the eye and attractive to everyone and would draw positive vibes from all those with whom you may come in contact with.

Smiling also reduces the level of the stress hormone Cortisol, While triggering the release of endorphins which increases our level of happiness and the best thing about it is that the triggering mechanism is the movement of the muscles in your face so your brain can’t really differentiate between a true from the heart smile or one in which we are trying to lift our mood by just trying to stay positive, and releases the endorphins in both cases.

So even if you are sad, disappointed, and depressed smiling will help elevate your mood.

6) Mental detox

Just like our bodies need to detox from all the toxins produced by eating fatty foods and alcohol, our minds also need to detox from all the negativity, stress, and anxiety.

I have a 20 minute detox routine that I do daily, which consists of a 5 minute Scottish shower of which 3 minutes of hot water then 2 minutes of ice-cold water, the Scottish shower helps reduce stress and increase ones level of alertness(Kind of jump starting your brain with ice-cold water shock).

The next step is to for 10 minutes of positive visualizations and the last five minutes are spent reading inspirational, motivational quotes and short stories.

7) Pause to wonder

“He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.”- Albert Einstein

When is the last time you have taken a moment’s pause to admire the beauty around you.

Do you remember the first time you felt rain? The First time saw the ocean?

Most of us wouldn’t be able to forget such moments, even if we tried too.

So, what is stopping us now?

Why can’t we connect with our environment in our daily hustle and bustle to make ends meet all really worth it, if only even for a second you are able to take a Pause to wonder?

Hope you all would find my micro habit’s bringing a positive change in your life, do feel free to ask or express your views in the comments.

-----

Aly Shah is the Founder of The Determined Capitalist. He always had a keen interest in Business management, Entrepreneurship, and achieving financial success with a strong belief in the potential of a determined individual, he has started his website with the aim of providing Motivation and Guidance for such individual. You can contact him through his website.

The post 7 Simple Micro Habits for Success appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

8 Reasons Millennials Have The Potential To Be Highly Successful

Some have said millennials are lazy and they are not ready to become responsible. People have said generation Y is so different from previous generations. Yet it is important to understand the valuable assets this generation has and rather than underestimating them only to see that they have redefined the meaning of success and self-worth. Here are reasons why millennials have the potential to be highly successful.

It is never about face time

Millennials are so consumed with the benefits of technology they do not see why a person has to meet face-to-face with an employer or a client. It is not about being social or not, they just believe face time or physical presence is more impactful when it does not have to be a major part of the day. The benefit of this to the millennial is that instead of having regular meetings and engaging in face time discussion they can sell results, not hours on the meter or time in the building.

They are not ruled by the conventional

Millennials are not prisoners of tradition; rather they want to define a new channel and path. While in the past, farmers were prisoners to their jobs on the fields and industrialists were prisoners to their factories, the millennials understand that there are limitless possibilities in today’s world. They know that more can be done with their devices and gadgets than fists and muscles. The millennials were born into a digital world where a playroom, a research library, a movie theater, and the yellow pages for the entire world could fit into their pockets. This taught them that sometimes the unconventional is possible.

They believe in values than wealth

According to a Pew Research Center study, millennials want to be an ideal model for their kids. For them it is not about achieving fame and a high-paying career but rather in making a difference and contributing to their world. Although they may not be as religious as people of previous generations, in a sense they are very spiritual and are concerned about developing good values. They see value in changing the world not increasing their bank balance.

They are focused on learning from the experience of others

Millennials tend to look up to people who have trudged the same path they want to take. They see such people as role models whether they be formal advisers, role models or industry icons. This is why they can read through articles and stories of people who are more experienced in the industry they are interested in.

They believe in living the moment

Millennials are not concerned about “what the world is turning into,” rather they are prepared to build their ideal world. They are willing to take risks and chase after their passions no matter the odds against them. They are enthusiastic and energetic about almost everything they try to accomplish, from building a career to starting family or becoming business leaders.

They believe in continuous learning

Unlike previous generations who want to show you certificates and physical proof of accomplishments, millennials are focused on learning and committing themselves to the process of personal development. Millenials believe that learning is a continual process and much can be gotten from surfing through the internet, whether it is You Tube or Wikipedia.

They don’t see borders or boundaries

Millennials are getting more connected than ever. They are having friends across international borders and destroying boundaries to build kingdoms. They are willing to hop on a plane or get engaged through Skype so they see the potential in using this technology to find the answers they need.

They are focused on happiness

At the end of the day millennials want to be happy, whether they are taking the traditional route or not. They simply want to answer the questions rather than wait for those questions to be answered by another generation. That is why they can chase their dreams rather than deadlines, they can travel the world rather being caught up in an office, and break hearts rather than fulfill vows.

Featured photo credit: http://www.photopin.com via photopin.com

The post 8 Reasons Millennials Have The Potential To Be Highly Successful appeared first on Lifehack.

A Glass Of Red Wine A Day Slows Cognitive Decline, Researchers Say

We often see conflicting studies about food all over the Internet. One day cow’s milk is good for you, the next cow’s milk is harmful to your health. But, when it comes to wine, it seems people across the board are in agreement: a glass of red wine a day is good for your health. In fact, red wine could do more than just enhance your food. It can preserve your memory for longer, researchers say.

Scientists at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago released findings of a new study funded by the National Institute on Aging that was published in Alzheimer’s & Dementia: The Journal of the Alzheimer’s Association. The study showed that just one drink of red wine a day may delay dementia in those at risk from the disease and keep the mind sharp.

As you may already know, cognitive decline is a normal part of aging.

“Everyone experiences decline with aging; and Alzheimer’s disease is now the sixth leading cause of death in the U.S., which accounts for 60 to 80 percent of dementia’s cases,” Martha Clare Morris, a nutritional epidemiologist at Rush University Medical Center, said in a statement about the new study.

Morris and her team of researchers reported that elderly adults who strictly followed a diet called MIND, described as a hybrid of the Mediterranean diet that emphasizes eating plant-based foods, were 7.5 years younger cognitively over a period of nearly five years than those who adhered to the diet the least.

“We have been studying the effects of nutrition on dementia for 20 years and felt that it was time to consider an overall diet that incorporated all of the science on nutrition and the brain,” explained Morris.

To do so, the researchers carried out an observational study of 960 adults with an average age of 81.4 years at 40 retirement community and senior public housing units in the Chicago area over a period of 4.7 years. They uncovered a slower decline in mental ability among the seniors who adhered most closely to MIND, or Mediterranean-DASH Diet Intervention for Neurodegenerative Delay.

This diet focuses on foods known to provide the greatest protection from cognitive decline. These foods include whole grains, green leafy vegetables, olive oil, fish, beans, nuts, the occasional chicken, and wine. Followers of the diet limit the amount of the five unhealthy food groups — red meat, butter, cheese, stick margarine, sweets, pastries, and fried or fast foods — that they eat. The only fruits in MIND are berries.

“The study findings suggest that the MIND diet substantially slows cognitive decline with age,” Morris said. In an earlier report, the researchers announced that the diet developed at the Rush University Medical Center may also reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease. Specifically, the MIND diet lowered the risk of Alzheimer’s by as much as 53 percent in participants who adhered to the diet rigorously, and by about 35 percent in those who followed it moderately well.

Other studies on cognitive decline have also shown that wine contains high levels of flavonoids, natural compounds that have an antioxidant effect, which helps with good blood circulation and improved cognitive function. These flavonoids are thought to work by mopping up excessive amounts of harmful chemicals that are naturally produced by the body, as well as making the blood less likely to clot.

While this particular study by Morris and her team only shows correlation and not causation, we’ll take it as an excuse to hunker down with a glass of the good stuff. Enjoying a glass of red wine in moderation may help with cognitive function and reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease, after all. That’s good enough reason for all of us to feel good about enjoying a glass of red wine every day.

Featured photo credit: Quinn Dombrowski via flickr.com

The post A Glass Of Red Wine A Day Slows Cognitive Decline, Researchers Say appeared first on Lifehack.

15 Reasons To Adopt Older Dogs Over Puppies

Many people tend to think about getting a puppy when they consider buying a pet, but why not consider senior dogs? Senior dogs can also be wonderful companions. Would you be willing to appreciate the beauty of an older dog waiting for a second chance at love?

Below are some of the reasons why you should consider adopting a senior dog:

1. Save An Older Dog’s Life

Older dogs are often overlooked compared to younger dogs and puppies. They will be the first to be euthanized if not adopted. Younger dogs have other opportunities for adoption, but can the same be said for older dogs? If you do walk into a shelter someday, be a life-saver, a hero, a person with compassion, and try to see if that one senior dog would be a good fit for you. That senior dog is looking for a second chance to live- and to love a new family.

2. Older Dogs Are Still Capable of Love

Older dogs have hearts of gold and can be just as sweet and loving as puppies. Dogs in general are loving creatures, and there is no reason to think that older dogs are any different. If you love them, they will love you twice as much.

3. Senior Dogs Have Good Temperaments

While puppies and younger dogs tend to be more energetic and always seek attention, older dogs are generally calmer and more stable. They do not mess up your furniture or house like puppies or young dogs do as they go through their maturation. They are simply gentle souls.

4. Learning Tricks is Not a Problem For Older Dogs

There’s a saying that you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but this is not true. Older dogs can still learn tricks and perhaps even find the process easier as they are more calm and focused on what you are trying to teach them.

5. Older Dogs Like to Chill Too

Want to relax on a lazy day? Feel free to invite an older dog over to relax and cuddle with you. An older dog is more likely to welcome and enjoy naps with you after you have had a long day or just want to chill on a lazy afternoon.

6. Older Dogs are Good with Kids

If you have kids, adopting a senior dog is a good option. Older dogs generally are patient with kids. They are less rowdy and not as rough as puppies and younger dogs can be during playtime. In addition, they will also be protective of the kids. A senior dog may also have had experience living with kids within its lifetime so it should not be difficult for them to adapt.

7. Senior Dogs Make Great Friends for Human Seniors

If you are living with an elderly member of the family or thinking about getting a senior dog for an elderly person, it is a wonderful choice. Senior dogs are wonderful companions for human seniors. Not only will they help look out for the human senior when needed, they will also serve as a good friend since they are going through the same stage of aging. Some senior dogs may have had experience living with the elderly in the past too.

8. Older Dogs Have Learned Lessons

An older dog is more likely to have learned many lessons over their lifetime, such as not to chew on furniture or pee inside the house. They will notice human emotions and actions more than puppies and younger dogs who are not mature enough to understand that “no” is a warning to be obedient to your commands, for example.

9. Older Dogs Are Just as Cute as a Puppy

A puppy is cute- but so are senior dogs! They look just as cute and behave in a very cute manner too. You can take the same amount of cute pictures or videos of a senior dog as you can with a puppy. You will adore a senior dog just as much as a puppy, and maybe even more, if you only let them leave some pawprints across your heart.

10. Older Dogs are Loyal and Devoted

When senior dogs realize that they have a new family, they will likely give their owners 100% loyalty and devotion for being willing to take a chance on them. Seniors dogs will be forever grateful for your act of kindness.

11. Older Dogs Don’t Necessarily Have Problems

Some people tend to think that older dogs have issues and that is why they are abandoned at the shelter. This is incorrect thinking because many senior dogs have no issues; they may have just been abandoned due to the age of the previous owners.

12. Every Dog is Unique

Young or old, every dog is unique. An older dog can show you its own special personality and loving nature provided you give it a second chance to love again.

13. Older Dogs Don’t Change in Size

The size of a senior dog will not change. What you see is what you will have to deal with. While a puppy or younger dog may continue to grow larger in size, adopting a senior dog allows you to see from the outset the maximum size it will reach.

14. Older Dogs Get Along with Other Pets

Older dogs are more likely to have lived with other pets in their lifetime. As such, it is actually easier for older dogs to adjust to living with other pets, if you are concerned whether an older dog would fit in with your current pets.

15. Every Day is Special

An older dog may not have a long lifespan compared to a puppy, but that makes every day spent with them a special day. Every single day is worth something to them and you. It is not the number of days that matter, it is what makes each day special. Quality over quantity is always best.

What are you waiting for? Go and seek out a senior dog to be a part of your family. You will not regret it.

Featured photo credit: Celine Nadeau via flickr.com

The post 15 Reasons To Adopt Older Dogs Over Puppies appeared first on Lifehack.

10 Amazing Countries That Perfectly Fit Budget Travelers

You want to travel but you are hesitant because you don’t think you can do it on a budget. There are many awesome countries you can visit that happen to budget-friendly as well. I have been fortunate enough to live in Europe for the better part of eight years, and in that time I have traveled much of the continent. While many countries in Europe are expensive there are some that are reasonably priced. Most of this list will focus on Europe because I don’t think people realize how cheap you can travel throughout Europe especially if you do away with the hotels and stay in hostels.

1. Greece

The economic crisis has turned off some travelers from visiting but plenty of people are taking advantage of Greece’s scenic landscape and economical fares. Visit all the ancient ruins in Athens (there are a lot of them) for only $15. Enjoy specialty foods such as souvlaki and Greek salad or indulge in an Ouzo or Tsipouro drink. As a budget traveler, I lived off chicken souvlaki and Greek salad the entire week I was there. The food was delicious and the prices were hard to beat. Plus, you can view one of the most amazing sunsets in Santorini for free!

2. Turkey

What’s unique about visiting Turkey is that it’s one of the only transcontinental countries or country that is in two continents. So you can visit Istanbul or another city within the European mainland and then take a ferry ride across the Bosphorus or Dardanelles strait into Asiatic Turkey, otherwise known as Anatolia or Asia Minor. I was stoked when I arrived in Istanbul to experience the variety of cultures and religions that make up this beautiful city. I was equally thrilled when I found out all I had to do was hop on a ferry boat for about an hour and I would be in the Asian part of this serene country. The best part was how inexpensive it was to explore history. Additionally, a kebab made with chicken or lamb meat is only going to cost you $1 or $2. A simit, a kind of Turkish bread usually eaten for breakfast, is even cheaper and my personal favorite, lahmacun or Turkish pizza, is very reasonably priced.

3. Morocco

A short plane ride from Western Europe will land you in this incredible country. I didn’t know what to expect when I visited this African nation but I was happily satisfied with my experience. Unlike in Istanbul, visiting the local mosques is not possible for non-Muslims besides a couple exceptions. Regardless, there is a lot to see in this country, and in most cases it is free of charge or very inexpensive. There are two-day Sahara desert tours that leave from Fez and Marrakech that are as cheap as $65 per person. If I would have had more time there I would have definitely taken advantage of this.

4. Hungary

I put on Hungary on this list for the simple fact that I am biased towards Budapest. I have not traveled much outside of Budapest, but I was immediately drawn to this city, and I didn’t want to leave. The vibe of the city is enticing and inviting at the same time. Everything was cheap there from the food to the beer; especially the beer. $2 for a 24-ounce beer is a heck of a deal. It is easy to get around the city on foot or by public transportation. I would stray away from taxi drivers because they tend to gouge tourists. I would suggest that a budget traveler visit one of the local spa baths. The prices vary depending on the spa but reasonably-priced ones will cost you about $10.

5. Germany

Germany is a huge country with lots to see. Unfortunately, it gets a bad rap for being too expensive for the budget traveler. I think most of this stems from some of the major attractions in the bigger cities in the country. But even some of the most popular German attractions are economical to experience. For example, Brandenburg Gate (Brandenburger Tor) which separated East Berlin from West Berlin during the time of the Berlin Wall is free of charge. You simply walk up the stairs from the underground station and there it is.

The point is — don’t sleep on Germany as a place to travel to on a budget. There are many convenient and cheap restaurants or food places to buy famous German specialties. Beer is very cheap as well probably because Germans love their beer and they want to share it with as many people as possible. Train travel within the country is relatively cheap especially if you do your homework early and order tickets as soon as you know where you are travelling.

6. Croatia

I haven’t spent a lot of time in this beautiful country but I was really impressed with what I saw. I was especially excited about how cheap it was to eat and drink. I spent most of my time in the capital city of Zagreb. There is a lot of history to go along with an amazing culinary culture. If you go to Zagreb or anywhere else in Croatia you have to try some cepavici, a traditional meat dish. Travelling to Split and other spots near the Adriatic Sea are reasonable and worthwhile. Dubrovnik is very nice as well but be careful of the prices there because it is not so budget-friendly.

7. Estonia

I have been fortunate enough to visit Tallinn, Estonia’s capital and largest city, on a few occasions. I love Northern Europe and would suggest that anyone visit these lands if they have the time and the money. Visiting Estonia is much cheaper than other countries in Northern Europe. There is a significant Russian influence, reminiscent of its time as a member of the Soviet Union. But I found this influence to be interesting and not predominant. Eating out and enjoying the night life are very reasonable as long as you stray away from the tourist stops right in the center of town. There are some really cool medieval castles that are worth seeing as a budget traveler.

8. Italy

Italy has so many places to see, and like Germany, the pricing of the country can vary depending on which places you visit. Yet, you can definitely travel to Italy on a budget. Even an expensive tourist city such as Venice and Rome can be visited by a budget traveler. It goes without saying that Italian food is delicious but it is also reasonable as well. You haven’t truly eaten pizza until you eat in Italy. Take advantage of the differences in the northern and southern cuisines. If you are into beach life than Italy is a great place to visit. Italians know how to enjoy their beaches and the best part is that they are free.

9. Spain

Simple ways to save money in Spain include opting for buses and metro stations as opposed to trains. It is not always the easiest way to get around but it will save you a lot of money, plus you get to really absorb yourself into the Spanish culture. Also, focus your meals on breakfast and lunch because typically these meals are much cheaper than dinner. I’m not saying you shouldn’t have dinner, rather that you should make sure you eat much bigger breakfasts and lunches. Bigger cities like Barcelona and Madrid are great spots to visit but there are also many smaller cities like Malaga and Marbella that are nice as well.

10. Bulgaria

I have yet to visit but I hear this place is a hidden gem for budget traveling. I look forward to visiting the capital city Sofia or perhaps enjoying one of the cheaply-priced boat cruises.

You can travel almost anywhere on a budget. It takes a lot of planning and a sense of adventure. If you are willing to stay in hostels and explore places on your own, sans tour guide, than you can travel cheaply. You can still enjoy the local fair without spending an arm and a leg in expensive restaurants.

Featured photo credit: Topwalls via topwalls.net

The post 10 Amazing Countries That Perfectly Fit Budget Travelers appeared first on Lifehack.

This Will Make You Think Twice Before Eating Ramen Noodles Again

Instant ramen noodles are a staple in college dorms and are also embraced by those who are looking for a quick and filling snack around the world. China has the highest per-capita consumption of instant noodles, but the US does not come in far behind, ranking sixth in instant noodle sales after China and Hong Kong, Indonesia, Japan, India, and Vietnam.

This junk food satisfies a salty craving and is fine to have every once in a while, right? Unfortunately, research shows that ramen might be a lot more detrimental to your health than was once believed. Here are some reasons why dried noodles are not the safest food to consume.

They increase the risk of metabolic syndrome for women

Instant ramen is made by either flash-frying or air-drying noodle blocks, then packaging them with seasoning that includes monosodium glutamate. A typical cup of noodles contains at least 2,700 milligrams of sodium, while the FDA recommends that the maximum sodium intake to be 2,300 milligrams per day (1,500 milligrams for certain high-risk populations).

According to a study done by the Journal of Nutrition, women who consumed instant ramen with these types of unhealthy ingredients were more likely to develop metabolic syndrome, no matter how much they exercised or what else their diet consisted of. Some of the main contributors in the ramen’s ingredients to this syndrome were “high sodium, unhealthy saturated fat and glycemic loads.” Individuals with metabolic syndrome are more likely to develop chronic illnesses like heart disease, diabetes, and stroke. Women are believed to suffer from an increased risk of metabolic syndrome because of their different hormone levels and metabolic rates in comparison to men.

They contain the chemical Tertiary-butyl hydroquinone (TBHQ)

TBHQ is a chemical byproduct that comes from the petroleum industry and is an inexpensive food additive that is used to cheaply preserve food.

A study at Massachusetts General Hospital was conducted to find out what happens to ramen two hours after it was consumed. A tiny pill camera was ingested and the results were astounding. The test results showed that instant ramen tended to linger longer in the stomach cavity than homemade ramen due to TBHQ. The dangers of this chemical byproduct have been linked to the weakening of organs and development of cancerous tumors, including stomach tumors. To view the video, click here.

There have been findings of Benzopyrene in certain brands

In June 2012, the Korea Food and Drug Administration (KFDA) found traces of the carcinogen Benzopyrene in six different brands of instant noodles produced by the Nong Shim Company Ltd. Although the KFDA claimed that the benzophyrene levels were not harmful, there were later findings of other batches that had issues and had a recall later in October of 2012.

They contain bisphenol-A (BPA)

The chemical BPA is widely found in the styrofoam cups that often contain the noodles. BPA has been known to be a carcinogen and a hormone disruptor. A hormone disruptor like BPA can cause hormones in women, like estrogen, to develop irregularly and lead to diseases like breast cancer.

BPA has also been found to have an effect on the developing brains of infants in the womb. In a study conducted in 2011, women who had high levels of BPA in their systems and were pregnant were more likely to have daughters who exhibited signs of anxiety, hyperactivity, and depression as early as three years of age. Boys were not affected the same way, but it is currently unclear why. Children are thought to be affected the most because their brains and bodies are still developing.

It has also been shown that BPA can lead to other chronic illnesses like heart disease, diabetes, and certain forms of cancers.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via flickr.com

The post This Will Make You Think Twice Before Eating Ramen Noodles Again appeared first on Lifehack.

Why You Should Praise Your Children’s Effort But Not Their Innate Qualities

“Wow, you’re a really great artist!” “You’re so smart!” “You were born to sing!”

At first glance, you’d think these compliments would serve to motivate children as they complete whatever task they’ve set out to do. And, as far as the short-term is concerned, you’d be right. It’s definitely easier to get something done when you have others reinforcing the notion that you’re completely able to do it.

But what are these statements really praising?

Compare them to the following:

“I like how you used different sized brushes in this painting!” “You figured out how to solve that problem, that was tough!” “Your voice sounds better and better every day!”

The difference is obvious: The first set of compliments simply serves to tell children that they’re “good at” something, while the second set actually praises their hard work and learned skills. Being told you have a gift certainly helps drive children to complete a specific task, but applauding their work ethic will keep them motivated throughout their lives.

Praising Talent

Though it may seem counterintuitive, praising a child’s natural talents can actually lead to low self-esteem in the future. The child who’s been told time and time again what a great musician he is will become disheartened when he inevitably meets a peer who is a more accomplished musician than him. The so-called “gifted” child doesn’t take into consideration the fact that his peer may spend countless hours practicing multiple instruments on a nightly basis, but will rather just assume “he’s better than me.”

Discovering that he’s not the best will make this child afraid to try harder. Since he’s always “been good” at playing music, he’s never experienced failure. This unknown entity will ultimately block him from improving his talents any further, and he may end up quitting altogether. Despite having the talent to actually be the best musician around, his sudden lack of self-confidence hinders his ability to work hard to improve, leaving his actual abilities stagnant.

Praising Hard Work

On the other hand, imagine the parents of the other child. It’s likely they consistently praise their son not because he’s a “naturally-born musician,” but because he’s dedicated himself every day to becoming better at each instrument he plays. While he might have been born with a knack for playing music, it’s been instilled in him that talent only gets you so far – it’s your drive to do better that earns you true success.

A child who grows up understanding the value of hard work and dedication won’t shut the door on trying things he’s “not good at.” He knows that practice makes perfect, and the only way to get better at something is to keep at it. Unfortunately, many children, and even adults, don’t understand this concept. So many otherwise intelligent people shrug certain things off by saying they’re “not good at it” (How many times have you heard an adult say they “aren’t a math person”?).

Those who understand the importance of hard work also aren’t afraid of failure. They don’t see failure as a roadblock; rather they see if as a bump in the road on the way to success. These children have been told over and over how amazing it is that they persevered through a difficult situation and came out on top. They also learn from the mistakes they’ve made, rather than let their mistakes define their entire being.

Lastly, those who are constantly driven to do better end up learning more than just enough to “get by.” While naturally-talented children may skate by on their God-given gifts by doing the bare minimum, those who work hard will gain more than just surface-level abilities. By raising the bar each time they reach a certain goal, they’ll continue to use their talents in conjunction with their efforts in order to reach incredible heights.

Featured photo credit: First Kid’s 2012 Christmas Party and Talent Show / First Baptist Nashville via farm9.staticflickr.com

The post Why You Should Praise Your Children’s Effort But Not Their Innate Qualities appeared first on Lifehack.